Every year, my therapist asks me to share my goals for the new year. I begrudgingly agree, but honestly, I hate the concept. (In fairness, she guides me in creating specific, actionable plans as opposed to general statements). I resent how a single day causes society to hyper-fixate on self-improvement. People create resolutions they abandon a week later. Let’s all agree on bettering ourselves daily, huh?

As expected, she asked me to think about my 2026 goals a few weeks ago. This time, though, she gave me something else to think about. She asked, “What were you most proud of yourself for in 2025?” This question caught me off guard.

We’ve been discussing confidence and pride in our sessions together recently. Conservative religion warns of the consequences of these traits but doesn’t differentiate between a healthy acknowledgement of one’s accomplishments and arrogance well. So, I lean toward a pessimistic self-view and downplay anything good about myself.

This question nagged at me, though. So, to celebrate myself, I wrote twelve things I did in 2025 that make me proud of myself:

1. I went to GriefShare.

Early in 2025, I joined a GriefShare group to help process the loss of my grandmother in late 2024. I felt unsure about sharing my grief with strangers. However, I recognized the importance of processing outside the channels of my family, who were also grieving. I went every week and found that it helped me to share my emotions out loud. Ultimately, I felt more capable of handling the loss myself and thankful I had attended.

If you’re grieving and interested in learning more about attending GriefShare or need resources, click here.

2. I started a movie club.

Late last year, my wife and I joined Bumble BFF to make new friends. She had more success than I did. I racked my brain for ideas on meeting people I had something in common with. Finally, I thought of starting a moviegoing group. I love movies—I have an AMC Stubs A-List membership and see most anything I have a remote interest in. So, I started a Facebook group for people to get together and see movies. I intended for us to watch thought-provoking films that encouraged discussion at a bar or coffee shop after. Through that, I thought friendships would naturally develop. Ultimately, I didn’t continue the group for several reasons, but I put myself out there and tried.

3. I hiked the Oak Mountain State Park’s Blue Trail.

I have nothing else to add—you can read about that here. It was awful, but I did it.

4. I was with my family when my grandpa passed.

My last post talked about the loss of my grandma. I didn’t share at the time that my grandpa had died this past summer, only months after grandma. I was present with my family during his last few days.

Early last summer, I knew my grandpa probably didn’t have long. With that becoming clearer, my wife and I agreed on my visiting him for likely one last time. What worked best for me was flying from Florida to Nebraska early one week to see him, then flying into North Carolina at the end of the week and meeting up with my wife (who would drive) so I could be present for my nephew’s first birthday party.

By the time I arrived, it was clear my grandpa would pass in a short time. I felt torn: I could either say goodbye and be in North Carolina for my nephew’s birthday, or I could stay with my family and miss the party. There was no correct answer. I understood I wouldn’t disappoint anyone with my decision. Ultimately, I stayed with my family. My grandpa passed away at the end of the week. I stayed for a couple more days and flew home.

Why did this decision make me proud? Instead of basing my decision on what would make others happy (or disappoint them least), I did what was best for me. That, and I was supportive of my mom and her siblings. I helped take care of things after he passed. Witnessing the passing of someone I cherished deeply, along with the separation from my wife, was difficult; still, I felt I made the best choice.

5. I accomplished a lot of housework.

In three years of marriage, our guest room became a de facto storage unit. In September, we were expecting guests from overseas. That set me on a mission not only to organize our guest room, but truly to clean it. I gutted the entire room. I either organized, donated, or trashed everything.

Then I went about cleaning and organizing our entire house. I rearranged and decorated my home office, had some walls sanded and painted, organized closets, and built furniture, among other things.

I’m not known for being a handyman, so completing these projects made me proud and motivated me to pursue others in 2026.

6. I completed the JaxStacks reading challenge.

The Jacksonville Public Library has an annual reading challenge. They provide 16 categories to choose from, such as:

• A book with a neurodivergent character
• A book written by multiple authors
• A book written before 2000

Participants pick 12 of these categories and read one book for each. Doing so earns you a reward from the library.

I finished the challenge last year, and read several other books, too. Reading more means learning more, thinking more, and growing more, and less time doomscrolling on Instagram.

I strongly recommend this challenge. Aside from reading more, it challenged me to read books of different genres. I’ve already compiled my reading list for 2026 and am excited to do it again.

If you’re interested in seeing this year’s categories or completing this year’s challenge, click here.

7. I was more generous with our money.

For many years, my wife experienced myriad health challenges. They significantly worsened after we got married. Her illness rendered her unable to work consistently for a couple of years. I had a full-time job but a poor salary. Times were hard, and our financial situation was strained. We needed help. Asking for help felt uncomfortable, yet our families and friends saw through our pride and always helped. I silently promised to pay it forward when we were able.

In the past two years, our situation has improved dramatically. My wife had two much-needed surgeries, which bettered her health. She got a job and quickly received two promotions. I changed jobs and received a pay bump. We finally have a sense of independence.

So, this past year, we were able to give more. We donated to a couple of friends’ fundraisers. At Christmas, we helped a close family friend in need by contributing to their new refrigerator. Sometimes, we took our parents out and treated them for a change.

This could seem boastful, but it is not my intention. I am proud that I remembered my promise. I hope never to forget our past struggles. As others helped us, I want to help others.

8. I’ve said yes more.

I have depression. It’s easy for me to stay indoors, though I know going out will help. I can’t quantify this well, but as my wife and I talked, we agreed I’ve done better at recognizing my emotional state and getting out of the house when I know it will be helpful. Sometimes, that means going to social events when I don’t want to. Other times, it means tagging along with my parents or my mother-in-law for errands when my wife is at work. It always means considering the time I spend at home or alone and recognizing how this affects my mental health.

9. I’ve helped my mother-in-law with her business.

My mother-in-law owns a small business that focuses on payroll processing and business advising for other small businesses. She’s passionate about what she does and heavily involved in a women’s business owner’s group. Late 2024, she hired me to help her with things such as file management and organization. I’m guilty of minimizing my role, but truthfully, it saves her a lot of time. I’m glad to help her.

10. I started this blog.

It doesn’t feel like much—I don’t know what it will look like in 2026, I’m self-conscious of being public with my thoughts, and what if I don’t stick with it? But that doesn’t matter; I started it. I’m giving myself credit for what I’ve done.

11. I’ve begun improving my social life.

When I started working from home in June 2023, I was ecstatic. I love the flexibility it provides. My psychiatrist and therapist provided some words of caution, though: don’t let that prevent you from leaving the house. It’s become easier than ever to become permanently homebound: you can order groceries to your door, there are more “come-to-you” and virtual services, and there’s a world of books, music, video games, television, and movies only a fingertip away.

After I called it quits on the movie club and as the year progressed, I found myself increasingly lonely, particularly as my wife had greater success with the friends she was making.

In December (never too late to start, right?), I attended my first meetup group. Rather than giving up, I persisted in attempts to connect with people when I didn’t hear from them. I reached out to old friends and people I had lost contact with. I hit up casual acquaintances I wanted to get to know better.

Having a community around me has made me happier. I recognize not everyone will be my greatest friend, but they can still be good company (something I’ve struggled to accept). I’m looking forward to doing more with others in 2026.

12. I’ve been smarter with our money.

Overseeing our budget is my job. I don’t control it, but I make sure it gets done. We communicate about everything. When I was younger, my dad tried desperately to get me to understand the importance of spending wisely, denying yourself wants, saving money, and investing. Sometimes, though, when you’re 18 and you think you know everything, you don’t listen. Now in my late 20s, I regret that. I often think my old man was onto something.

So, I’ve started denying myself things I want. I’ve started saving for things a way off that will catch me off guard if I’m not careful (e.g., a new car when one of our cars inevitably fails). Instead of using credit, I buy only what I can pay for. I’ve moved money to different accounts to take advantage of better returns on investments.

Sure, we still have debt to pay off, and perhaps it’s not at the rate we’d like, but we’re making progress, and most importantly, we’re ensuring we don’t accrue more.

Writing this post has been a fruitful activity. Something about this challenge ate at me. I asked myself repeatedly, “What am I proud of myself for?” My focus on the positive aspects of 2025 grew as I asked myself this. As I kept thinking of it, my mindset shifted from disappointment, regret, and frustration to gratefulness, confidence, and positive self-esteem.

While 2025 is still recent, I challenge you to take some time when you’re able—whether that’s on a day off, on your commute, or lying in bed one night—to ask yourself what you’re proud of. I’m confident that if you do, you’ll see a positive change.

So, what are you proud of yourself for? Comment below or reach out to me here. I’d love to hear from you. And think of this with me from time to time during 2026.